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الحمل
هل لديك كعكة في الفرن؟ هل تملئك بوميض متلألئ، أو تجعلك تشعرين أنك متورمة مثل سمكة كروية؟

بدءاً من القيء في الصباح، واشتهاء الطعام، إلى زيادة الوزن وضعف التحكم في البول؛ من المؤكد أن مدخلات ومخرجات الحمل تجعل أي امرأة دائمة التيقظ. قابلي الممثلة الكوميدية المقيمة في مدينة نيويورك، كارولين كاستيجليا، وهي تأخذنا في جولة شديدة الفكاهة عبر الوقائع المرحة لدورة لاماز، ومتعة التخدير، وآلام التقلصات في سرير المستشفى الواسع.

ما الذي يحدث عندما يكون الطفل غير مرغوب فيه؟ تعرفي قابلي أندريا هوبر، المولودة في النمسا، وهي أم عازبة على وشك الوضع تواجه الحمل وحدها وتسعى إلى هدم الفكرة المثالية الخلابة لدى المجتمع عن معنى أن تكوني حاملاً. وماذا إذا كان الحمل غير متاح؟ قابلي تيرتيا ألبيرتين، من جنوب إفريقيا، وهي تتعامل مع الإحباط بعد تسع دورات فاشلة من التخصيب المعملي. ما الذي ستفعله عندما يؤدي أول حمل ناجح إلى مولد "بن"، وهو طفل ميت دماغيًا ويزن "أقل ... من عبوة سكر"؟

انضمي إلى النقاش واشتركي في صفحة "اتخذي إجراءً!" الخاصة بنا، حيث تساهم نساء حول العالم بأفكارهن حول هذا الجهد البدني والعقلي لمدة تسعة أشهر. وعبر القصص الملهمة ومزيج من استكشاف الوسائط المتعددة، نتجمع من أجل أن نعبّر عن متع ومصاعب الحمل، والولادة، والرحلة الطويلة بينهما.


Upasana Wangnoo Saigal
المديرة
الهند
After giving birth to my beautiful daughter in the month of December 2003, the meaning of the word pregnancy changed forever for me. My choice to bear our child, the child of someone I found complete faith and love with, was culminated in those precious few months before giving birth to Lyla. Never before did I feel ‘full’, like a pot of water on a really hot day. There was a feeling of fulfillment and completion. Pregnancy as my grandmother would say – cannot be put in words but felt and experienced in skin.

What were your experiences of pregnancy like? I invite and welcome you to join this conversation and share your thoughts on pregnancy
انشري تعليق
محادثة سجلي الدخول لنشر تعليقك | لست عضوة ؟ انضمي الان
31 - 12 من 51 الصفحة الاخيرة | الصفحة السابقة | الصفحة الثالية | الصفحة الاولى

Posted on Thursday, May 03, 2007 8:23 AM
I also want to add further that Human Rights lawyer Varisha Farasat was here in Kashmir. We met at Cafe Arabica as strangers. But in short period of time she could recall that She has been reading my comments on IMOW and I had also read her Bio-data and her story and thus two of us felt connected and warm. This is again an example how IMOW can bind the women together.
انشري تعليق

Posted on Thursday, May 03, 2007 8:18 AM
With this Comment I really want to thank IMOW who have given me a VOICE which is so important as far as women in Our part of the world that is Sub-Continent especially Kashmir is Concerned. It really instills confidence in me to get more and more involved for the cause of women as I also feel empowered because I can share with the rest of the world what i really think as feel as a woman. In my opinion men can hardly understand the Psychological stresses which a woman has to undergo. I am feeling connected with the world. I also feel that my views matter to the world. And credit goes to IMOW. I am really thankful for providing me a Voice.But This is just the begining and we have to go a long way to furnish our goal of Women Empowerment
انشري تعليق
Sonja Zettl
ألمانيا
Posted on Thursday, May 03, 2007 1:35 AM
Shamini, right now I feel great about my future life as a mother (blame the mood swings during pregnancy!). Yesterday I visited my prenatal class together with my husband for the first time. I am definitely a little afraid of the birth. It is looming in the background like a big unknown universe. But as millions of women before me I will also go through it. Thanks for your invitation to share my birth experience with you.

My thanks to Andrea for her kind and encouraging words. You are a very strong woman. My own mother was a single-mum and I know what it means to raise your child alone.
انشري تعليق
shamini chandraprakash
ماليزيا
Posted on Friday, April 27, 2007 8:09 AM
Sonja, you are most welcome and make sure to share with us your experience of giving birth. Don't worry, you will definitley be a good mother. Tke care :-)
انشري تعليق
Andrea Huber
النمسا
Posted on Wednesday, April 25, 2007 10:18 PM
These words are for Sonja and all the women who find themselves in question, doubt or fear about what the future holds for their life as it evolves after giving birth. First I would like to say that ANYTHING is possible _ I say this from experience as a single mother who faced a pregnancy alone, without a partner, without financial stability, a home or an education under my wing. At 21 I became pregnant and had to drop out of school to pay for my pregnancy and future of my child - all the odds were against me, but I found that where there is a will, there really is a way.

My little spark of life is now 4 and I am now one year away from graduating with a BFA in photography, I have a 3.7 GPA, I am already working as a professional hi-end editorial photographer and my work has been published in leading international photography magazines of our world. In a recent interview they were especially interested in my life as a single mother and as an artist, I was so internally amazed because 4 years ago I had no conception that people all around the world would be learning about my life and challenges as a single mother, how it has shaped me and my photographic work. Which it really has, and I could never receive what that experience has given me from anything else in the world - strength I didn't know I had inside, and I am already a very strong woman, perseverance which has filtered into my education and career, passion for life because having a child forces you to live honestly or not at all, these things and so much more.

I can't really say that I enjoyed my pregnancy because it was so emotionally painful as a single mother-to-be, but I can and will say that nothing in life is perfect and you never know when or what is going to happen to you, but it is what you make of it and how you chose to live your life that matters. I think that's really what's at the core of how we all feel and are talking about, not just motherhood and pregnancy, but what we have made of it in our lives and what that life means to us. The beauty of our life and experience is in our hands, it's really up to us to make choices and create a life that is in line with our goals, principles, values and dreams, and there are no excuses for that.

Is this possible with a self-concerned 3 year old or an explorative teenager that pushes outside of our boundaries? YES! It is about time, balance, role modeling and accountability. Is much of your day consumed by a little one who can't take care of themselves, perhaps, but you can infuse things that are meaningful to you in your relationship and time with your child - baths can be taken together with candles, music and rubber duckies. With the independent teens, your happiness depends on your parenting, do you hold them accountable, and do you explain why instead of hashing out? Children and teens sometimes are brought up to know their sense of self, knowledge and meaning as it is explained to them by the world, but what a large world this is and how easily they are influenced. If we teach them to communicate openly, honestly and logically - then dishonest or false attempts to pull them in a direction that is not comfortable or normal to them will not succeed, because they feel the purity of what you have ingrained within them and that is what feels right to them.

A balance, that is a difficult issue because mommy is often the primary caregiver, perhaps has to work and find time for herself and relationship. I find that if you give undivided attention to the little ones for a period of time, they too will need their own time and you can play next to each other doing your own thing. Being tired from work doesn't help with stress or tolerance, but as long as you can dedicate and invest in alone time, then I believe you can come back refreshed and prepared to handle anything. Make sure to make time to do your favorite things while they are napping and while you are together - share your passions with them!
انشري تعليق
Jenny Aquino
الفلبين
Posted on Wednesday, April 25, 2007 6:02 AM
What I dislike about being pregnant.

Other people:
- Telling you what to do with your pregnancy and life while pregnant. People will often tell you that you’re allowed to do this and that you’re not allowed to do this and that in case it affects the baby. They’ll tell you to change the way you live your life without you asking them for any advice to begin with.
- Telling stories that do not help your condition. People will often compare your condition to a relative they know or a friend they know who got pregnant and had a difficult time having the pregnancy. Or how difficult it is for a person in your condition to adjust your life once more to a new baby.
- Insisting you do what they know is right even if you don’t ask for it. They’ll tell you that you shouldn’t do this, that you shouldn’t do that, That you can’t do as you please because you’re pregnant to a point that what they’re telling you is for you to stay stuck in one corner, watch your tummy grow and get bloated and forget you had a life even after you give birth.
- Debates about future prophesies of who it’s going to look like if it’s a boy or a girl. More often than not, people will tell you that the baby’s going to look like this if it’s a girl or boy, and that they hope the baby won’t take after you given your own deficiencies. Joke or not, these people should just shut up and do you a favor by dropping dead.
- Giving you advises that are so ridiculous based on old wives tales. Old folklore will always come up during pregnancies. That a woman isn’t supposed to take a bath at night because the baby’s going to get cold. Or that a woman isn’t supposed to sew during the first trimester since sewing might close off the baby’s anus and all that bull crap that comes from old wives tales.

B. Physical limitations
* Mobility or the total lack of free mobility. – When you’re pregnant, you’re limited to travel from one place to another. Aside from that, a simple ride in a tricycle or a taxi does havoc on your bladders when you run over a hump or a hole in the road.
* Activity or the lack of allowable activity. – During the pregnancy especially towards the last trimester, your legs begin to weaken and walking becomes such a tiring activity even if you’ve only walked for 5 minutes. You can’t bend, you can’t reach for anything that falls on the floor, you can’t even take a decent shower since you can’t reach your legs properly enough, let alone wash properly enough due to the huge mass that’s formed around your waistline. Eventually, if you don’t get enough exercise, your legs bloat with liquid retention and everything else follows because you’re not active enough to get rid of the fat and the liquid your body consumes.
* Physical discomforts and the back pain, kidney problems and tummy aches. – When the stomach enlarges from the fetus, every organ around your uterus gets swept aside. The spleen, liver, intestines, bladder, kidneys and appendix gets moved into a tight spot against each other that a simple movement from the fetus will make you pee in your pants or make your last meal come out the same way they came in. If it isn’t the bladder or intestines, you’ll begin to have shortness of breath because your lungs are so tight with the liver and spleen being pushed up against it. Lying down or sitting up becomes a marathon feat since you can’t bend to stand up or lie down. You can’t lie down because you can’t breathe properly and you can’t stand up that long either because it’s torture to be pregnant and on your feet longer than you have to. If you sit down, you have to make sure that your tummy is protruding outwards since to sit up straight is not the right way to sit down.
* Diet and food intake (What can be or can’t be taken) – on top of the cravings you have during the first and sometimes second trimester, you are going to be told that you cannot consume junk food, processed food like hot dogs and hams, salami or even canned food.
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Posted on Wednesday, April 25, 2007 5:22 AM
I really believe that pregnancy cannot be put in words but felt and experienced in skin...it is the most strong example of power and awareness!
The vibrant strenght of a "pregnant body" is just amazing....
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Upasana Wangnoo Saigal
المديرة
الهند
Posted on Tuesday, April 24, 2007 11:15 PM
Having a child, bearing a life within you.. Is it a question or is it pressure?
Do we spend any time in our lives realizing that there might be consequences of our opinions and attitudes towards other members? Things we say, not follow in our lives necessarily? What is our role as women in liberating thought process of our friends, sisters, sister in-laws and many women who surround us with the complex questions of becoming mothers. Do we perhaps influence a person’s natural decision to do the same and perhaps not really applicable to their lives and circumstances?
Those few months of pregnancy are important- do we as women become caring towards each other or do we let envy take a better hold of us?
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Tanketa Tanketa
جامايكا
Posted on Tuesday, April 24, 2007 6:16 AM
There can be no doubt that women are today more aware of the joys and ills of pregnance. Whilst I can fully appreciate a woman's right in some societies to choose whether or not she wants to conceive some still hold to the belief that a woman's life is not complete until she bears a child. The more the better in some instances. If we know this to not be the truth then one wonders what it is that causes women to yearn for the experience of child bearing and birth.

Despite being educated and accomplished some women still feel incomplete without the joys of giving birth. There may be then something innately within some of us that indicates when our biological clocks begin to tick out of control saying to us it is time to give birth. I personally have no children but would like to one day. There are many things I would like to achieve and have children is one of them. That is not to say that not having children as a woman is a sign of failure but instead we all set goals and accomplishments vary as one does not have to experience childbirth in order to experience the joys of motherhood.
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Sonja Zettl
ألمانيا
Posted on Tuesday, April 24, 2007 1:10 AM
To Shamini: Thanks for your beautiful and encouraging words.
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Imagining Ourselves Team
الولايات المتحدة الأمريكية
Posted on Monday, April 23, 2007 4:39 PM
Be sure to check out the International Museum of Women - Motherhood Today blog on Yahoo! Health.

http://blogs.health.yahoo.com/intlwomen
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shamini chandraprakash
ماليزيا
Posted on Sunday, April 22, 2007 6:34 AM
To Sonja, don't worry. Everything will be just fine. To all the women out there...believe me, it is a beautiful experience to be a mother. You can choose the name, the dress, the colour for his/her room, the way to raise your child and lots more. Children are always children...bear with them and they will be just fine. Enjoy your pregnancy and the delivery. Experience the beauty of breastfeeding and the extra pounds that you are going to put on. Be happy during your pregnancy and your baby will be exactly like you....Love your baby and enjoy your life. Pray and have faith...be strong. Believe me, you are not going to regret having a baby. You would want more after the first one....
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Sonja Zettl
ألمانيا
Posted on Friday, April 20, 2007 5:46 AM
I am pregnant right now and my son will come in 2 months. So far my pregnancy was uncomplicated and I don´t feel overly bloated or fat. I really enjoy the feeling my son gives me when he is moving inside of me. I never thought I would be that overwhelmed by those little movements. And you can already feel the connection. When I startle he startles just seconds after me inside of me. It is in a way unbelieveable. But I am not someone who sees everything through pinkcoloured glasses. The financial situation of my husband and me is not the best. I am a freelancer and we are largely dependend on the money I make. I will take some time off after the birth but will have to go back to work as soon as it is possible. I know that my husband will help and two grandmothers are just waiting to be able to help, so all in all it is not a bad situation but still I am always afraid if we will be able to provide enough for him, if we will be able to guide him and show him the right way or at least some way? Will he find his way in this ever-changing world? Will my husband and I find a common way of raising a child? How will our relationship change? Having a baby and working is stressful. Am I strong enough to handle both, work and raising a child? Questions after Questions. Having a child is not only a joyful occasion. It also changes your life completely. It will never be exactly as it once was. And I do not think it is wrong to admit that sometimes you wish your old life back. Little children are demanding and by nature egotistic. They don´t care how stressed you are. I think a pregnancy and having a child is at the same time wonderful and joyous and very very scary.
But each woman faces that question one day. Children, yes or no? I have a lot of friends without children, who openly admit, not to want any. They are all in financially stable and good situations and I just look at them and their plans till they are pensioners which is to work and to go for holidays and to go out for dinner, generally speaking, to just care for yourself and your own selfish needs for the rest of your life. I don´t think it is wrong to do that but I never wanted that for myself. To me this seems like such an empty life. But I don´t know, may be two years from now I will be jeaulous of them!
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Upasana Wangnoo Saigal
المديرة
الهند
Posted on Thursday, April 19, 2007 10:31 PM
We wish many couples like Bea all the luck for their endeavors to solve the ever-complex issue of conceiving and the process of pregnancy. And hope sincerely that they feel a swell in their womb very soon.
Would like to raise the issue about the role of the partner, family and friends during those nine anticipated months?
It is true that in many ways father are frequently not liable in raising their children. Are we as individuals, trying to change the perception by involving them more in a process which is clearly more intimate and physical to women?
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Bea
أستراليا
Posted on Thursday, April 19, 2007 4:39 AM
"Is it not possible to let go the feeling of control, to let down your defenses and try giving many orphans a chance? Is holding life inside you bigger than being a parent? Is it so restraining that no other option seems to open doors?"

Adoption is such a complex issue it really needs a forum of its own. Most infertile couples are, first and foremost, just trying to take the easiest path to parenthood. It's not a simple matter of being restrained by the notion of pregnancy (or genetics), couples are also being restrained (or in some cases prohibited) by practical, personal and ethical issues surrounding adoption. Like I said, it's a whole subject on its own.

It might, however, be a good place to point out the health benefits of pregnancy. A quick look around the exhibit can tell you of the risks and unpleasantness, but pregnancy and breastfeeding also lowers your chance of reproductive cancers. As someone who's seen death, illness and ongoing, physical side-effects related to such cancers in close family members, I personally do find it hard to walk away from something which will reduce my risk - for my own sake, of course, but also for the sake of my family and the children I bring into it. Heck, it's even made me eat brocoli.

Bea
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Ali Smith
الولايات المتحدة الأمريكية
Posted on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 9:50 AM
I'm a photographer currently working on a book of photography about mothers and motherhood; what it is to be a mother, how and if one can parent well while maintaining a sense of self, etc. I'm located in New york and have been photographing and interviewing many wonderful women here for two years now. I was inspired by the openness and honesty of many of the women on this site in regards to a subject people often feel they have to be either positive and chirpy about or totally and fully opposed to. There isn't room allowed to express a lot of ambiguity and uncertainty in regards to feelings towards motherhood and how it may change your life or yourself. Mothers are simultaneously sanctified, given impossible standards to live up to, and reviled at the first sign of trouble with a child, in a way fathers are commonly exempt from. It seems to be, ultimately , mostly on their shoulders how their children turn out. Is there truth to that?

Please contact me if you are in the NYC area and interested in participating in this book project. My website is www.alismith.com and my email is alismith_too@yahoo.com

all the best to all,
Ali
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Upasana Wangnoo Saigal
المديرة
الهند
Posted on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 1:17 AM
For many pregnancy is something, which is an onset of hope, and for many it holds disappointment.
Disappointment, which leads to hurt, hatred, anger and complete understood biased feelings towards others who perhaps are not in the same situation.
Is it not possible to let go the feeling of control, to let down your defenses and try giving many orphans a chance? Is holding life inside you bigger than being a parent? Is it so restraining that no other option seems to open doors?
Of course it is difficult but each change that we make, though perhaps rare, can herald hopes and joys in many different ways.
Life does take you down a very rocky path and pregnancy could just be one of them.
And if abortion done 14 times on a body is allowed then I wonder whether these women even have a choice to live?
Fear has to be discarded in order to generate awareness and support for women’s basic rights.
And perhaps portal like IMOW are harbingers of such change.
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Posted on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 12:41 AM
To be mother is one of the noblest things on earth but to be mother of daughters is considered to be a curse in the context of Indian sub-continent but if you are mother of sons even if they are worthless is always a blessing. Whenever any woman is pregnant she is given the blessing 'Doodo Nahaw Pooto Phalo' which means that may you be blssed with male children which again speakks of status of girl child in society. How long it will take us to change this centuries old Psyche of the traditional and conservative forces of our society? To sustain and nurture creation in her womb is the clear cut proof of women's strength. Whenever I will be a mother I would prefer to be mother of a girlchild rather than a boy.
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Posted on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 12:05 AM
Being Unmarried I have no experience but to be the harbringer of life on earth is one of the most beautiful experience for a human being. Whether Paegnancy is a burden or a blessing is strongly dependent on circumstances. In the context of Kashmir where generally people give preference to a male child how can a woman feel when she is made to go a series of abortions 14 times because she had a female baby in her wound and was allowed to have her 15th feotus because it was a male feotus.
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Bea
أستراليا
Posted on Tuesday, April 17, 2007 8:26 PM
Thanks Niyati Sharma for asking - I'm doing well, considering it's been one week since my D&C, a procedure in which they removed the "non-viable products of conception" from my uterus under anaesthetic. We are now waiting for the results of testing, which may or may not tell us why the pregnancy didn't continue, and our followup appointment with a recurrent miscarriage unit in Sydney. We will go through the usual process of reviewing our options - trying again, donor gametes/embryos, adoption, childlessness (it all looks so good!) - and thus complete another cycle of hope and loss and grief.

I have to say, I understand the comments from those who want to make the point that pregnancy and motherhood isn't always glamorous or joyous, that it leads to a loss of control, privacy, and self-esteem. Based on my own history and what I see in others - whether fertile or not, whether working towards parenthood or not - it seems these are things we all face as we age, regardless of individual experience.

It seems at some point, no matter who you are or what you're doing, life will take you down a peg or two. You'll have to learn that you can't always call the shots. You'll have to learn that things change, physically and permanently, and sometimes for the worse. Pregnancy and parenting can teach you that, or it might be infertility, or it might be something else entirely, but the result is the same. You're left feeling unsettled, unsure, scarred and ugly, lost. I guess it's what my grandmother, in her wise and quiet way, would call "growing up".

Bea
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القصص المعروضة الان
"لبن الأم "
Bettina Salomon, النمسا
"الأم العازبة القادمة"
Andrea Huber, النمسا
"الترحيب بإيلوي"
Tiffany Teske, كندا
"مقتبس من "استغلي الفرصة: كيف تحصلين على أكثر من طفل في الشهور التسعة القادمة""
Kate Hodson, بريطانيا
"بلا عنوان (أغنية ريفية حزينة صوتية)"
Bea, أستراليا
"احتفال التسمية"
Amy Oyekunle, نيجيريا
"اقتباس من فيلم "وجود الماء""
Rian Brown, الولايات المتحدة الأمريكية
"ساعة الولادة"
Potyra Giovanetti Labonia, البرازيل
"خطاب إلى ابنتي "
Flavia Goncalves, البرازيل
"روح معنوية مرتفعة"
Carolyn Castiglia , الولايات المتحدة الأمريكية
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Tertia Albertyn, جنوب أفريقيا
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Nathalie Wiesner, الولايات المتحدة الأمريكية
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Oumou Sangare, مالي
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Linda Elvira Piedra, الولايات المتحدة الأمريكية
"هارز إم جنوم"
Zulal, أرمينيا
"كعكة في الفرن"
Alys Hawkins, بريطانيا
"My Story"
Teresa K., كينيا
"ابتكار صيغة خطاب جديدة حول النساء والولادة والحمل "
Jessica Resmond, فرنسا
"الأمومة "
Andrea Annunziata, البرازيل
"العناق، والارتباط، والأختان، والطفل المفاجأة، والتغيير"
Christine Luksza-Paravicini, الولايات المتحدة الأمريكية
حقوق الطبع محفوظة للمتحف العالمي للنساء 2008 / سياسة السرية وإخلاء المسئولية / ترجمة:101translations / تغيير اللغة